I went to my high school's Homecoming football game last night. It was a lot of fun. I was yelling all sorts of things. We didn't win, but that's ok. It was a close game. I heard from one of my friends that's in the Marines. He's stationed in Maryland right now until January, but after that he's gonna be stationed near by so that will be good. He'll be able to come down and see his old friends. He says he's gonna bring some of his Marine friends down to meet me which is cool. My cute little kids had their Halloween carnival on Thursday. It was pretty fun. My Godson was a Caterpillar, his sister was Cinderella, and the oldest boy was a Leopard. They were adorable! The only weird thing was that they were giving away live goldfish as a prize? It wouldn't be so weird except they had a million and these kids are in preschool at an all day childcare. This means they are young and irresponsible with busy parents. I bet the fish aren't fed regularly. I hope they all survive cause losing a pet is a sad thing. Especially when kids are little. School is going all right especially since we've reached the halfway mark. Yay! Saw my exboyfriend and that was weird. He was waiting to pick up his girlfriend and as soon as he saw me standing there waiting for my ride, he moved his car. Hmmm, could someone be trying to prevent an interaction between 2 people? Is he afraid the truth might accidentally fall out? Doesn't he realize if I really wanted to say something I would have by now? Whatever.

My sentiments exactly Bobby.

Tyler doesn't know,
That Bobby and I,
Do it at his house every Friday.

I tell her that we sleep,
But we really fuck,
And I’m on my knees, and...

Tyler doesn't know, oh.
Tyler doesn't know-oh.
So don't tell Tyler!
Tyler doesn't know,
Tyler doesn't know.
SO DON'T TELL TYLER!

Bobby says he’s out working,
But he’s under me and I'm not stopping.

Cuz Tyler doesn't know,
Tyler doesn't know,
Tyler doesn't know,
Tyler doesn't know.
So don't tell Tyler.
Tyler doesn't knoooooow....
DON'T TELL TYLER!

I can't believe she’s so trusting,
While he’s right behind me thrusting.

We’ve got her on the phone,
and I’m trying not to moan.
It's a three way call,
and she knows nothing.
NOTHING!!!

Tyler doesn't know,
Tyler doesn't know,
Tyler doesn't know,
Don't tell Tyler.
Cuz Tyler doesn't know,
Tyler doesn't knoooooow....
SO DON'T TELL TYLER!

We'll put on a show, everyone will go.
Tyler doesn't know,
Tyler doesn't know,
Tyler doesn't knoooooow....

The, parking lot, why not?
It's so cool when he’s on top.
His front lawn, in the snow.
Laughing so hard, cuz...

Tyler doesn't know,
Tyler doesn't know.

I did him on her birthday.

Tyler doesn't know,
Tyler doesn't know,
Tyler doesn't know,
Tyler doesn't know,
Don't tell Tyler.
Tyler doesn't knoooooow....

Tyler will know,
Tyler has to know,
Tyler's gotta know,
Gonna tell Tyler,
Gonna tell her myself.

Tyler has to know,
Tyler has to know,
Tyler has to,
Tyler has to,
Tyler has to go!

Tyler doesn't know,
(Don't tell Tyler)
Tyler doesn't know,
(Don't tell Tyler)
Tyler doesn't know...
Tyler's gotta go!

Happy 19th Birthday to Zachary Walker Hanson, the youngest member of the band Hanson! I love him, I love him, I love him. He's gorgeous!

I hope he has a great day. I know I'm going to. I'm going to see "The Grudge" tonight with my posse and then we're gonna get wasted!!! Tomorrow we're supposed to carve pumpkins! I love Fall. Not really but it sounded good. Catch ya on the flip side!

I just finished a quiz in my Humanities class. It wasn't as hard as I had imagined which is good because I didn't study as much as I should have. I think I did pretty good though. Gotta love the multiple choice. I'm still feeling ill but I know why this time. I haven't eaten since noon yesterday. That's almost 21 hours ago. I passed on dinner last night cause I wasn't in the mood. I saw the movie "Saved".

It was really good.Patrick Fugit is gorgeous!

That pic is from "Almost Famous" which is where I first met him

::Sigh:: He totally fits my image of Charlie from The Perks Of Being A Wallflower, which is like my favorite book ever! I'd recommend it to anyone.

I'm only making a post cause I have nothing else to do. I don't want to sit outside reading or writing; it's cold. I like the library. Everyone is so close and yet they are all individually involved in whatever it is that they are working on. I'm feeling woozy. AHHH! My chair totally just went back really far and scared the crap out of me so I jolted back upright, looking like a freak the whole time. It was super. I need to get back to writing in my journal. It's been like a week. I can write things in there that I don't really want anyone else to see but at the same time, I don't want to hold it in. It's too painful. If I can't talk about it, I must write about it or else the feelings are going to get way out of control and I'll just explode. I want to write about something more serious here, but I'm not ready yet. Maybe I never will be, but I'll try again later. I want to organize my thoughts. I don't want them to look as though I've hurled my insides onto the page to make a steaming pile of incoherent shit.

You were the first thing that I thought of
When I thought I drank you off my mind
When I get lost in the liquor
You're the only one I find
And if I did the things I oughta
You still would not be mine
So I'll keep a tight grip on the bottle
Gettin' loose and killin' time

This killin' time is killin' me
Drinking myself blind thinkin' I won't see
That if I cross that line and they bury me
Well I just might find I'll be killin' time for eternity

I don't know nothin' 'bout tomorrow
I've been lost in yesterday
I've spent all my life just dying
For a love that passed away
And if there's an end to all my sorrow
And this is the only price I'll pay
I'll be a happy man when I go
And I can't wait another day

This killin' time is killin' me
Drinking myself blind thinkin' I won't see
That if I cross that line and they bury me
Well I just might find I'll be killin' time for eternity
Yes, I just might find I'll be killin' time for eternity

Killin' Time ~ Clint Black

Oh that song hits me on so many levels right now. I'm physically ill at the thought of it all. Somebody save me. I love country music because I can find songs that fit my life and my moods no matter what. I mean, you can never "Find me in the club, bottle full of bub". That shit aint neva gon happen, aight?
Humor helps dull the pain.

I'm just tired from staying up all night drinking!" Heehee, that's all we could say yesterday. I had so much fun Friday night. We got wasted, watched a crappy movie, met some new people, and drunken dialed our friends. It was awesome! We were drinking Bacardi Gold, Smirnoff Vodka, and some Mike's Hard Cranberry Lemonade. We watched this movie called "Elephant" by Gus Van Sant.

The movie was ok until the ending. It sucked! So we hate it now. We probably hate it more cause we were drunk at the time. Emotions are always heightened when drinking. We met some people and got invited to party at their house. They were pretty chill. We were probably 2 of the most trashed people there though. It's all good though. For everyone that's seen EuroTrip, remember that song "Scotty Doesn't Know"?

Well, we made up a few different renditions of it and sang them loudly in the middle of the night accompanied by electric guitar to our friends on the phone. It was fucking great! Does anyone know if you're allowed to carry a sword around the mall? We took a sword to the knife shop in UTC but we decided we should put it back in the car before we went into any other stores. I wasted my day yesterday though cause I spent it sleeping when I got home and then preceded to sleep through the night only waking up to take a few phone calls. Back to reality now though cause I have to do some homework. Yeah right, I'm probably gonna skrew around on the internet and maybe watch a John Cusack movie.
Mmmmmm.

That's not really worthy of an entry but I wanted to change my music so I find it appropriate...Plus he's hot!